Things you need to know when dating a Non DND player (from the POV of a DND player)
Dating someone who doesn’t play Dungeons & Dragons can be a beautiful, confusing, occasionally hilarious experience.
On one hand, they bring fresh energy, snacks, and emotional stability. On the other hand, they have absolutely no idea why you’re emotionally devastated over a fictional goblin called Nigel.
Here are a few truths you’ll quickly learn when your partner has never rolled a D20 in their life.
1. They Will Have No Clue What You’re Talking About
You will sit there, eyes shining, recounting the most incredible moment of your campaign.
You’ll explain how the wizard pulled off a master play by sending an illusion to distract the ogre, how the paladin leapt in with a critical hit, and how the rogue nearly died but survived because of a perfectly timed healing word.
And your partner will look back at you like their eyes are the dark voids of the abyss.
No flicker of understanding.
No gasp at the drama.
Just polite nodding and the occasional, “Oh wow, that’s… nice, babe.”
You could repeat it twenty times, draw diagrams, introduce puppets, and they would still be thinking, “So is this like Monopoly?”
Bless them.
2. D&D Jokes Are ‘Be There’ Moments
DnD produces some of the funniest moments known to humankind.
Unhinged nat 1s.
Accidental war crimes.
That time the bard tried to seduce a door.
But trying to explain those jokes to someone who wasn’t there is like trying to teach a goose how to climb a tree. It’s just not going to happen.
You’ll be crying with laughter saying, “And then the barbarian threw the horse through the window!” and they’ll respond with, “Why was there a horse indoors?”
It’s not their fault.
It’s a sacred language forged in dice and poor decisions.
3. Snack Providers Become Instant Legends
If your partner brings snacks, makes food, or helps set the scene in any way, they will be treasured by you and the entire party forever.
Turn up with a tray of garlic bread during combat?
Elite tier.
Remember people’s drink orders?
Mythical being.
Light a candle so the dungeon feels atmospheric?
You are basically the group’s patron deity now.
No one will ever forget their kindness. Their name will be sung in tavern songs long after the campaign ends.
4. They Will Accidentally Create the Best Character Ideas
Non-D&D partners have a magical ability to suggest things no seasoned player would ever think of.
You’ll be agonising over backstory and they’ll casually say, “What if your wizard is scared of spoons?”
And suddenly you’ve got the most interesting character trait you’ve ever had.
They don’t know the rules, which means they aren’t limited by them. Their suggestions range from genius to absolute chaos, and honestly, both are gifts.
5. They Will Judge Your Dice Hoard, But Secretly Support It
At some point they will discover the dice collection.
The many dice collection.
The “why do you need this many shapes of the same object” collection.
They will ask sensible questions like:
“Don’t you already have dice?”
“Why does this one look like a cursed sweet?”
“Do they all actually do different things?”
But then, on your birthday, they will buy you a new set because “they looked pretty,” and you will feel seen on a spiritual level.
Conclusion: It’s Actually Pretty Wonderful
People often joke that nerds who date non-nerdy partners have it rough. That they’ll never understand your passion, your characters, or why you shout “NAT 20!” in public.
But honestly, it can be quite the opposite.
The little bits of interest they show, the way they listen even when they’re lost, the snacks, the questions, the willingness to sit through a four-hour session just to be near you, that’s what matters.
They don’t need to understand every rule.
They just need to understand you.
And if they cheer when your paladin lands a critical hit, even without knowing what that means, you’ve already won the real campaign.
Want to get your DnD partner something special this Valentine's? Check out the blog below:
